relationships

Novel Writing For Self-Realization

November is National Novel Writing Month. This is my third year participating in this adventure. The goal is to complete a novel of 50,000 words in 30 days. My two previous novels sit here on my computer. One day I will self-publish the first one.

The second novel was a story that was fun to write but very personal. I noticed it stayed with me after I finished it. Traces of the story seem to become part of a greater reality for me.

As I began plans for this novel I decided to approach it in a unique way. I would use it to influence my mind - especially my unconscious mind in ways to heal my past, to invite new possibilities of experiences, to encourage the expansion of my consciousness and to assist me in growing my abilities to be present, be aware and be more self-realized.

Why Your Addiction To Doing Is Sabotaging Your Life

If you want to know if you are addicted to doing, here’s the test: Take 30 minutes and do nothing. Watch how your body reacts. Notice where your thoughts go and notice what feelings get stirred up.

As you do nothing: your mind races, your body feels uncomfortable and your emotions are like a rollercoaster. Just like the addicts I use to work with in my previous job.

Actually these reactions are not generated by a true addictive withdrawal but more by the ego-mind feeling it’s loosing control.

How To Stop Resentment From Killing Your Relationships

Have you ever stuffed a feeling just to keep things okay in your relationship? The answer is YES. If you deny you have, we need to talk because you are either a saint and I can sit at your feet and learn or (I am betting on this second one) you need to get help identifying what you feel.

Resentment is a secondary emotion generated by unexpressed feelings. The more you deny, ignore, or push down your feelings the more resentment you gather in your body.

Making Your Relationships Important

If you are truly interested in building powerful relationships in your life there are important guidelines that will make a huge positive difference. I trust you will find these ideas very helpful for both those you love and for your relationship with those you work with and those who are your clients. The following essentials will lead to meaningful and valued relationships:

* All relationships are greatly affected by the quality of your heart. If your heart is guarded and protected, your connection to others will be limited. If fear guides how you connect to others, you won’t significantly connect to most people.

If your heart is open, if you have compassion for those around you, then people will want to connect. Everyone appreciates loving-kindness in his or her life.  Your open heart is the doorway into connecting at a deep level. This is no limit to the hearts capacity to bring love into all relationships.

* If you want to connect in a significant way with others, you must be able to accept them as they are. No one wants to be judged by you especially critically. Relationships built on the idea that you can change the other person are doomed to be frustrating and most likely to fail.

The judging mind needs to be transformed to a respectful and accepting mind if building healthy relationships matter to you. Acceptance is saying I want to have a relationship with you just as you are.

* You have to show up for a relationship to work. Many people related to others on a more superficial level and with little or no genuine interest in who they are interacting with. This lack of real contact means there is only a superficial exchange which is not a relationship. 

Showing up means you are fully present when you related to others. That means you are hearing and feeling what the other person is saying. You are listening with compassion not just in waiting for your turn to talk. Being fully present to another is a wonderful gift.  It is a gift of the heart and ones that keeps giving and receiving.

* This final relationship essential is the realization that those you are in relationship with are not separate from you. This means, “All of us are connected to each other.” “There is a little of everybody in you.”

When you help lift a person up, inspire them, give them encouragement, you are also lifted up, inspired and encouraged. If you treated others with kindness and respect they will treat you the same way. If those you connect with are expanding in their minds and opening in the hearts you too also become a more expansive person.

A quick easy relationship reminder is: 

Open and Accepting heart

Focused in the Now

Realizing Your Oneness with all

Joseph's Update: Website is continuing to go through changes and my focus is coming into greater clarity.

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